When Enough is Enough

I guess instead of all the heartbreak
The sickness
The anger
The hurt
The pain
That I have I should fine something positive
I will pretend I am little again
And write a list of the things i am thankful for

Mike
Family
Friends
Counsoling
im still alive
the cats
the fish
for the memories of my dad atlhough sometimes i have no good ones

This is stupid because i have a “but” for all of them. I can’t see the positive right now, i tried i really did… its just making me more upset
I don’t know thats why i can’t fininish the collage in art, now its time for the positives and i can’t do it. I haven’t learned how to let go of the negatives yet….. am i always going to be this way … am i always going to be depressed and miserable and resentful.

My nose and mouth are numb, i don’t know what thats about. its been since i woke up … its really annoying and my skin is so dry its annoying me and my hair is too long and its annoying…. everything is annoying.

I just told my mom off about how she didn’t even invite me to her Thanksgiving dinner or anything. When i wasn’t going with Mike to dinner she said if i wanted to do something i could go with my aunt and grandmother but she never once mentioned to me that i could of gone with her. It bothered me and normally I would of just let it go, but this time i said something i had to. Mike said he was proud of me for standing up for myself. She just called back and im not answering it… i really don’t have the stomach for it right now. i really just dont care. FUCK HER

Fuck alot of things i want to vomit i want to lay in bed i want to hide i changed my mind i don’t want to go with mike i want to hide and be with whatever memories of my daddy that i have. Why can’t people understand that.

Filed under: No More Egg Rolls on November 23rd, 2006