When Enough is Enough

Ok so i have no energy what so ever. none. I ate lunch today now i feel like im going to fall asleep at my desk. i have to go over to my moms house tonight cause i didn’t go last night, and to the pharmacy….. then to mikes to do laundry and stuff then stay up to talk to my friend. Which i would like to do all of those besides the first two, i just feel like i can’t …. i feel so tired i don’t want to do any of it…i just want to go to mikes and take a nap . Thats what i want to do . Goodness im 24 years old what is my problem. I don’t know. I will have to force and push myself today though, i have no choice but to do that, tomorrow night too. We leave thursday. OMG what is wrong with me seriously. I will super force myself today no matter what. I already decided i was going to drink coffee at around 8pm if im still tired . Or maybe i will start laundry take a little nap and wake up at 10 when i have to list and then she will be online around then, that might be smart. I don’t know i’ll figure something out. I have to do my nails too they are getting on my nerves sooo bad, they just need to be filed they are all jagged and stuff its horrible, i scratch and itch and it hurts lol, i haven’t been up on that….. i feel like i have so much to do because i put so much off everyday…. cause everyday i feel like i can’t handle it. oh well. I must force myself i can’t say that enough, i have no choice but to do tonight what i have to do i have to remember that too, its not something i can slack off with again.
But other than that, im so glad my mom won’t be at her house tonight. She said she was going to cancel going to dinner at my stepsisters so that she could see me and i told her basically don’t bother im just dropping off the money and leaving. She keeps insisting that i bought a carton of cigarettes off of her and owe her 30.00 but i know i didn’t and don’t!!!! she keeps bringing it up though as if im lying about it. Its ridiculous. Oh well hopefully she gets over that and drops it, its starting to piss me off, well not starting to it has been. There are so many reasons i don’t want to see her or my stepdad….. too many to count and i don’t want to go into it or i’ll get all upset. Amy told me she has an unhealthy 0bssesion with me, and i agree, im like her pet or her hobby or something, if i don’t talk to her everyday she freaks out and starts showing up at mikes house apparently thats her new thing. Next time i talk to her im going to have to explain to her that if i don’t talk to her everyday nothing is wrong and we have to back off a bit. i wonder how she’ll take that. hhmm… oh well whatever. I guess i don’t have anything else to say right now, im too ugh to talk more im restless and sleepy at the same time, im getting cranky because im tired, i hate that feeling i know theres no reason for it but i can’t help it. Mike hates when i use the word can’t…i agree with him but in the same respect i don’t know how to stop. I guess i’ll figure it out as i go along. ugh one more hour and a half i can do this i know i can.

Filed under: No More Egg Rolls on August 1st, 2006