When Enough is Enough

The stupid pysciatrist office… i called there at like 10, they told me my prescription they forgot to write out before would be ready…i just went there and its not. they have left me without medicine for 4 days i think now…3 or 4 well guess what i can tell the differnece…im so up and down and pissed.

I hate hearing about Mike’s ex…. we had lunch today with our friends that just got engaged. So of course Mike’s wedding came up like i want to fucking here about that. I feel like if we get married it’ll be no big thing to him since he already did it. I feel like he doesn’t even give a shit hes not divorced yet…i offered to pay for it thats how badly i want it done, and he just keeps saying no she has to pay for it out of principal. Hes putting that petty shit infront of how badly I feel that hes not divorced he don’t give a fuck. I have to admit im jealous everyone around me is moving in together getting married having kids, meanwhile because of “principal” my boyfriend won’t get his divorce. Im so mad and hurt right now. Hes going to get his hair cut, left work early, which is probably a good thing or i would be fighting with him right now….. its all cause of my meds not having them i know….so i shouldn’t fight with him, thats why im writing here. And if he reads it oh well….he’ll know how i feel right now.

Im so sick of work, just sitting here. The day drags on and on and its friday, they won’t let us leave early for no fucking reason. They usually do, well they used to now they could give a fuck. Im cursing alot…sorry but im so angry. Even more angry that I have to go home to my mothers house and go in there only to find her in bed, she expects me to sit and talk to her…im fucking tired of sitting in her room, i take naps don’t get me wrong…but i fucking get out of bed every day….shes just ridiculous.

I bitch about the same shit every day and you know what…i don’t care…if you don’t like it then don’t fucking read it. I need my medicine so bad. I have to sit here for over 2 and a half hours stewing then go to my mom’s , stew some more….uuuggghhhhh…. this sucks ass.

I don’t even know what to do. I swear though if the accountant comes back from the store and says one word to me its going to be all i can do not to loose it on her…….. and i have to sit around tonight and do work too. Great . I love it. i sit around all day here with nothing to fucking do yet at 10 pm i have work 6 days a week.

I don’t know i really don’t know. Whatever fuck it. I will sit here and do nothing and say nothing and just be. It will be so much fun. I can’t wait for another minute to come so i can be happy yey every minute is so fucking great.

I think the boss is giving the secretary work which means we’re not leaving early. This just happens to be the worst day ever it really does. I love when i have nothing to look forward to. I love not having atleast my apartment to go back to. Im all alone all alone miserable .

mike just said stop turning the day into shit. I said easy for him to say hes not here, hes going golfing, and hes not missing any medication. Im going to the bar aftwer work until hes done. I’m not going to my moms…. then again …shit i can’t even smoke there wtf. i have no where to go i really don’t not where i’ll be happy anyway. Mike said he’ll be home when its dark. Great. I guess i am just going home and going right to bed. Fabulous. Im going to smoke i don’t care that i just got back from lunch i really don’t.

I guess i’ll go get my nails done, my prescription filled then go somewhere i don’t know where.

Filed under: No More Egg Rolls on June 23rd, 2006